What Pansexual People Want You To Know.

What Pansexual People Want You To Know.

Hello my lovelies! How’s your week going? I hope you’re staying well and taking some time away from the news and social media, and if you haven’t yet, I definitely recommend it; and besides, they’re all saying the same things anyway, so it’s not like you’ll be missing out for a few hours!

So, onto today’s post. Incase you couldn’t guess from the title, I’m pansexual, and today I’m going to be covering some of the most common questions I get asked, busting some myths and just letting you know what pansexual people want you to know.

Vickie Pan Flag Portrait

If you’ve been with me for a while, you’ll know that I’m a pretty open book with you on here, so you may know that I was in a long term relationship up until the end of February this year. Something you won’t know is that I came out as pansexual over the course of 2019 to those who are really close to me, and then I came out more formerly to more people this year. It took me until the beginning of this year to come out officially to my then partner, and in doing so a lot of questions were raised (understandably). You may be wondering if that was the reason for my relationship ending, and I guess you could say that was part of it? The good news is that we’re still friends and it was a mutual thing.

What you might find funny is that I never really properly came out like you see in TV shows or movies when it came to my family and close friends, we were just talking and from memory I think we were watching a TV show where someone came out and a discussion started and I just went: “well I identify as pan, so.. yeah.” and guess what, they were just like “oh, ok. What does that mean?”.

Naturally more conversations have happened since then, with lots of questions being asked and answered. One thing I will say right now is that I am incredibly lucky and grateful that I have an extremely non-judgemental family who support and love me no matter what, so they are perfectly accepting of my being pan; and I understand that not everyone is so lucky when they come out.

Even though my family and friends and I have had conversations about me being pansexual, I do still get asked questions every now and again, and there are still a huge amount of misconceptions out there about what being panexual or any part of the lgbtq+ community is. So, today I decided to bust those myths, answer some questions and tell you some things that pansexual people want you to know; obviously I don’t speak for everyone, but I’m going to try and cover things as best I can.

And with that, let’s get into it!

What does pansexual mean?

Pansexuality is the sexual attraction to people regardless of gender. Some people may say they are gender-blind, meaning that sex and gender are not determining factors in a romantic and/or sexual relationship.

I like to say that I’m just attracted to humans. When I like someone, I like someone, I don’t think about what’s in their pants.

Also… no, being pansexual does not mean we’re attracted to frying pans..

Is being pansexual the same as being bisexual?

No, they are not the same. Bisexuality is the attraction to two sexes or genders, males and females; whereas people who are pansexual are attracted to all genders and sexes. You can think of it like this, the terminology is different: Bi=Two whereas Pan=All.

I get asked this a lot, and most people get it after me explaining it a few times, but I usually go with the explanation of : where people who identify as bi are attracted to males and females, I as someone who is pan, can be attracted to anyone, regardless of if they identify as male, female, intersex, trans, non-binary, gender-fluid, agender, bigender, gender-queer etc.

Are you sure it’s not a phase?

Omg, it’s definitely not a phase for crying out loud! I don’t expect people to understand how I identify, but I like to hope that people accept it and respect it. And if you don’t, well then the chances are that we’re not going to be very good friends in the long run. If I were to say I was straight or bi or lesbian, you wouldn’t even question it, so why question it now?!


So does this mean you’re attracted to everyone?

Again nope, being pansexual means yes, we can be attracted to ANYONE, but that does not mean EVERYONE. Just like if you’re straight, that does not mean you’re attracted to everyone of the opposite gender or if you’re gay, it does not mean that you’re then attracted to all people of the same gender as you.

Chances are, out of most people in a room, we may only like a few, not all of them. Yes, our pool of people we could find attractive is bigger, but that doesn’t mean we fancy everyone we come in contact with. Sorry not sorry if that’s you.

Pansexual’s are unloyal romantic partners.

Absolute bullshit. No, we’re not going to cheat on you because we’re pansexual, just like if I were bi I still wouldn’t cheat on you because I can like more people. If someone cheats on you and they happen to identify as panseuxal then it’s nothing to do with how they identify, it just means they are an unloyal person to you. If I’m in a relationship with you, it’s because I like you, so stop thinking I’m about to run off with the next person I see!

We don’t care about how others identify.

Again, this can be a misconception and confusion. Although being pansexual means we don’t see gender when we’re attracted to someone, that doesn’t mean we don’t respect how other people identify. If I’m with someone who identifies as a trans-man, then I’m going to respect that, just like everyone else would. We don’t dismiss or not care about your gender identity, just like how I identify as a female and expect to have my gender identity respected, we’ll respect how you choose to identify and we won’t ignore it.

How did you know you were pansexual?

I’ve always gone by the saying ‘if I like you, I like you’, but it wasn’t until about two years ago that I fully realised that I was pansexual. And then it took another 6 months after that to begin coming out to people because I was scared that people wouldn’t believe me because at the time I was in a relationship with a man. When people ask me this question, I usually say that I knew when I realised that I was attracted to people and I just didn’t think about what was in their pants, I just liked who I liked, and I am extremely attracted to the androgynous look. Some people identify as bi first and then identify as pan, and that’s perfectly fine.

You can come out whenever feels right to you, you’re never too old to come out. If you come out after years of being in relationships with one gender, that does not devalue how you identify. You do you.

We’re still humans. Just like everyone else. We just have a wider span of people who we could fancy.

I’m attracted to humans.

And those are the myths and questions I am asked and presented with every now and again! I hope that this helped anyone who has questions about pansexuals, and I hope this is cathartic for anyone in my shoes! Being fully out as pan has allowed me to be my truest happiest version of myself, and that’s all because I decided to love myself as I am and accept myself for who I am.

Whether you’re out or not, learn to love yourself, and know that you don’t need to change who you are to fit other people’s norms. Be yourself, love who you want to love, and don’t be afraid to explore what your sexual orientation means to you. Being pan for me might mean something slightly different for someone else who identifies as pan and that’s ok. Both are valid and should be respected.

I can’t believe how far I’ve come from when I first came out, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for me. I know that one thing that will lie ahead for me is pride! I can’t wait to go to my first pride event, I’ve just got to wait for all of this isolation to blow over!

And with that, I’ll leave you with this:


Enough said. Feel free to ask me any of your questions in the comments or you can always dm me on instagram @theweightofmyworlds ! I always appreciate when someone is asking questions because they are wanting to learn something new and to educate themselves. As long as you’re being respectful, are in a safe place to do so and know that the other person is comfortable, don’t be afraid to ask questions (within reason obviously) and learn something new.

Have a great weekend everyone and stay safe out there (or should I say in there?).

Lot’s of love,

Victoria Blog Signature
Pansexual People Pin
Sunshine Blogger Award

Sunshine Blogger Award

Happy Saturday my lovelies! This week I had the lovely surprise of being given the Sunshine Blogger Award by the very lovely Abbie! I love these posts, they bring the blogging community together and we all get to know more about on another.

Before I start this post, I just want to say, I’d definitely recommend reading Abbie’s Sunshine Blogger Award posts here! From her post I found out we share a love of Emily Blunt, people watching and we certainly share the same sentiment when it comes to running.. or lack of running.. haha! Abbie talks about all sorts on her blog and her writing is so engaging, so it was an honour being nominated by her for this!
Sunshine Blogger Award photo

So, the idea behind the sunshine award is to highlight and nominate bloggers that you believe spread positivity, kindness and that are, put simply, rays of sunshine!

The rules go like this:

  • If you’ve been nominated, it means you’ve been given the award! So, congrats and well done!!
  • You must thank the blogger that nominated you and link back to their blog or their original post.
  • List the rules for this award and a snazzy logo or picture of it in your blog post.
  • Answer the 11 questions from the blogger who nominated you.
  • Nominate 11 more bloggers and set 11 fun questions for them to answer.


Onto my questions from the lovely Abbie:

1 . What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given?

Funnily enough this is a piece of advice, or maybe you could call it a quote, from Stuart Little of all things! Every cloud has a silver lining. So I try and make at least one person smile a day, I love positivity and try my best to radiate it! And it’s a great reminder that if you can look on the brighter side, things do seem brighter!

2 . The strangest thing you’ve ever eaten?

As a fussy eater, this one isn’t strange at all, but I can’t think of anything strange I’ve eaten; I think I once ate a worm when I was tiny? Haha! But a few of my friends thought it was weird that I like cheese and apple sandwiches.. which isn’t weird at all I later found out from loads of people who eat them!

3 . If you could make one rule that everyone had to follow, what rule would you make?

Ooo hard one! I guess it’d have to be that everyone is treated equally! A girl can dream no? Now that I think about it, also that war and violence is never an option! I don’t mind being naïve with these sorts of things, because it helps me to stay positive!

4 . What is your favourite smell?

Freshly baked bread or cake, coffee, fresh and warm laundry along with oranges!

5 . What would be your dream meal? Including starters, main course, dessert and drinks?

For starters it’d have to be.. freshly baked bread with butter (can’t go wrong with a classic, right?). My main course would be a roast dinner, it’s my all time favourite meal and I could eat it 365 days a year easily! And for dessert it’d have to be a chocolate soufflé with pralines and cream ice cream, anything warm and chocolatey is just a dream for my sweet tooth! The drinks to top it all off would be a Disaronno and fresh orange juice; I asked a bar tender to recommend a drink for someone who like Disaronno and that’s what I was given.. trust me, it’s delicious!

6 . Who are your five dream dinner guests?

There’s too many people to pick from! Is it too cheesy to say the Fab Five from Netflix’s Queer Eye? Or it’d be Michelle Obama, Anna Kendrick, Emily Blunt, James Corden and Chris Pratt. It’d be a pretty great dinner party if I say so myself.

7 . What film/book could you watch/read again and again and not get bored of it?

Legally Blonde has to have a mention here since I’m watching the first and second one for the fifth time in a row whilst I’m writing this.. and I am not sorry! It’s a great film about women breaking stereotypes in my opinion and is just such an easy breezy watch! And of course all of the Harry Potter books/films, I’m a huge potter head and am hoping to go back to the studio tours again next year!


8 . Do you believe in ghosts and the paranormal?

To this day I’m still on the fence! Part of me hopes there are ghosts and that the paranormal world does exist out of pure curiosity, but I’m a huge scaredy cat so part of me hopes not!

9 . If money and time weren’t a problem what skill would you like to learn?

Carpentry. I love creativity and I’m always thinking of ways to upcycle and change furniture, but sometimes my ideas are a bit too ambitious compared to my lack of skills with powers tools other than an electric drill! Haha!

10 . Are you a morning or a night person?

I used to be a morning person who would get up at 5AM EVERY DAMN MORNING. Then I became more of a night person.. but now I’m a bit in between and wake up around 7am! I love my bed and sleep a bit too much, so for me, an early night in is usually on the cards!

11 . Where would be your dream holiday destination?

There’s too many! I’d love to go to Canada though, I’ve not travelled too far away from the UK so Canada, America, China and Japan are on my bucket list!


Alright, so my questions are:

  1. What’s your go-to self care tip?
  2. What did you want to be when you were little?
  3. If you play an instrument, which one? Or.. what instrument would you like to play?
  4. Is there a quote you live by? If so, what is it?
  5. If you could only eat one meal, three times a day for the rest of your life, what’d it be?
  6. What’s one of your favourite childhood memories?
  7. Why did you start blogging?
  8. If you could step in the shoes of anyone for a day (like in Freaky Friday haha) who would it be?
  9. What 3 words would you use to represent your personal style?
  10. What gives you that extra spring in your step in the morning?
  11. If you were stuck on an island, who would you want to be there with you?


My nominees are:

And that’s just a small group of the amazing bloggers that deserve this award! Be sure to check them and their blogs out! You won’t regret it, trust me! Oh and if you share your Sunshine Blogger Award posts on twitter be sure to tag me @weightofmywrlds so I can retweet them and spread the love!

Being nominated for awards like these always bring a huge smile to my face and will keep me smiling for ages, and its a great motivation to keep improving and writing! What’s something little that brought a smile to your face in the last week? Let me know in the comments!!

Have a great weekend my lovelies, and Happy Easter!


Victoria Blog Signature

Sunshine Blogger Award photo

Versatile Blogger Award!

Versatile Blogger Award!

Hello my lovelies! I am so grateful and excited to be awarded the Versatile Blogger Award by another incredible blogger! Thank you so much to everyone that has supported me and my blogging journey, and thank you so much Pamela (@TheSparkleMomma) and Haziqa Ishtiaq (@haziqa_ishtiaq) for nominating me! The love, support and empowerment blogger to blogger is so amazing and being welcomed into this community has made me so unbelievably happy and grateful.

Check out Pamela and her amazing blog with the links below:





Check out Hasiqa and her awesome blog with the links below:





If you’ve been nominated, then that means you’ve been awarded the Versatile Blogger Award! So a massive congratulations to you my lovely!

Thank the Blogger/Bloggers have nominated/given you the award and include the link to their blog in your post. You can include as many links to their social media profiles as you want. Lets spread the love and support even more in this community!

Let the person who nominated you know 7 Things About Yourself.

Select 15 Blogs/Bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly and put them in your post.

Nominate the 15 Blogs/Bloggers of your choice on Twitter with their Twitter handles and include the Twitter handle for the Blogger or Bloggers who nominated you!


7 Things About Me:

  • I was born up north, I’ve moved around 10 times in my lifetime and currently reside in Cambridgeshire. I’ve lived here for a few years now and like it here; I’ve got family up and down the country but here will always feeling like home.
  • I never went to university; and it’s something I sometimes wish I did, but at the end of the day, I’m very happy where I am now!
  • I love art, drawing, painting, sculpting, photography and basically anything creative! I’ve loved art lessons since I was 5 years old; and it’s something I do regularly to relax and unwind.
  • I never thought I would start blogging. It was something I’d wanted to do for a very long time but didn’t have the confidence or website know how to do anything about it. But being such a creative person I’m glad I pushed myself to pursue it because I absolutely love it.
  • I want to write a book. I’m not sure what exactly about, just that it will be a sci-fi fantasy action thriller novel of some form. It’s something I’ve thought about quite a lot over the last few months and I think I’m going to make a start on something soon.
  • Christmas is by far my favourite time of year. It’s the lights, the music, the food (oh the food is so so good), spending time with your loved ones, the ugly and funny jumpers, watching loved ones open gifts that will make them smile and being able to wear so many comfy layers of clothes that it’s like I’m still in my bed!
  • I could survive off roast dinners and Chinese food for the rest of my life. I can happily cook a roast chicken dinner everyday and I would not get sick of it. It’s like I have a whole other stomach for that stuff haha!


Now you know some things about me, it’s time for me to pass on some more love to some amazing bloggers that deserve some recognition and a nomination!

  1. @chloexlizabeth
  2. @_amalog
  3. @wotawomandiary
  4. @BGbloggers
  5. @chimmykins
  6. @_ellabellax
  7. @Finlaygracex
  8. @foreverfiblogs
  9. @lifeofemmax
  10. @Stephloves4
  11. @MaudMPP
  12. @k8t4unicorns
  13. @BaileyLeahBlogs
  14. @LavraxB
  15. @SandSblogger

My list of amazing bloggers could go on forever! Check these great people out and give them some love!

Have a great weekend lovelies!!! Love,

Victoria Blog Signature